SLIDER

Secret Blogger?

The 'real life' and 'blogging life' divide is something I've never spoken about before but today I had an urge to write about this to hopefully start a discussion with you guys. My feelings are very hard to verbalise so I hope you understand.

So many bloggers I follow seem to have their blog and their real lives intertwined. All of their nearest and dearest know about their blog, understand why they take a camera everywhere and even help them with taking pictures and writing posts. I think this is wonderful but it sometimes makes me wonder why I can't be more open about my own blog.

Literally two people in 'real life' know about my blog and one of them is an ex who I don't speak to any more. The other is a best friend who doesn't really read it. Sometimes I feel guilty for being secretive and not mentioning a huge hobby of mine to my friends and family. Sometimes I question if it means I am lying to them or concealing something major about myself. I can spend a good portion of each day thinking about and working on my blog and the fact that no one knows this really does make me feel like they don't know a huge part of who I am.

"So Sinead, why don't you just tell them?" you must ask. Well, I honestly don't want to. And that's not because I'm embarrassed or ashamed in any way. I'm actually very proud of my blog. However, I just like to keep it separate from my real life. For me, it's more enjoyable that way. It allows it to be a form of escapism from real life. I can come hear and talk to my blogger friends who don't know me personally so can only form objective judgements of me. They are looking in on my life and my thoughts from 'the outside' so they can offer unbiased opinions and contribute real sincere discussions.

It's a fact of life that we behave a certain way around the people we know. For example, there are things we would talk about with some people but not others. This doesn't mean we are two faced, fake or not being ourselves It's just human nature to slightly change to another version of ourselves depending on the person we are interacting with.

By being a random anonymous girl to the people reading my blog I don't feel like I have to do that. I can just be the raw, original me. Talk from the heart about the things that are truly on my mind (and not worry that someone I wouldn't say it to is reading) and that is so refreshing and one of the reasons I love blogging so much. That is why I don't tell all of my friends, family and acquaintances to go follow my blog.

Still, I can't quite shake the guilty feeling that I am being deceptive. So I would love to hear what you guys think. Do you understand how I feel and my dilemma?

I would love to know what your real life and blogging life situation is. Let me know in the comments down below. 

30 comments

Sinead Dreaming said...

I totally get it. I'm a secret blogger myself. My boyfriend is the only person in my life who knows about my blog. I think i'm just not ready to let people know yet. I want to really make my blog my own and be 100% comfortable with it because Im afraid if I tell my family they might think its stupid or something and then ill become discouraged from it. Not saying my family will think that, thats just what lingers in the back of my mind.
I think its completely fine to keep your blogging life separate!


Renee | www.losetheroad.blogspot.ca

Sinead Dreaming said...

I used to be a secret blogger, mainly because I am quite a private person and didn't really want my friends to know my feelings. However, I have told quite a few people people now, but there still are some people I keep it from. I think it is a personal preference and nothing to feel guilty about. x

Sinead Dreaming said...

I'm a total secret blogger (apart from my boyfriend) and I like it like that. I'm slightly terrified about someone discovering it in real life and ruining it for me.

Sinead Dreaming said...

I'm a secret blogger and have been for five plus years and that's the way it'll always be with me. My husband knows, he likes to tell people about it, but for me, nah, I hate the questions, and I hate the attention. "Real life" people, bar again my husband don't even know about my twitter. Or that's what I like to think, i'd rather think I was tweeting and blogging to strangers than people I know.

Sinead Dreaming said...

I am a secret blogger too. I am not trying to keep it secret at all costs. My boyfriend knows, some friends do to but they don't check it too often. I don't brag about it, but if someone asks me about my blog I don't hide it.

Andreea Catsfika

Sinead Dreaming said...

It's a huge thing to share this part of yourself with everyone close to you - you're right we share different things with different friends so it's quite logical to only want to share the blog with whoever you choose.


I recently started writing a very public column for a paper which in turn has made many more people in my real world aware of the blog, I feel very weird that people now talk to me about it all and that they now know things I probably wouldn't have brought up in conversation...but that I'm apparently happy to share with a bunch of strangers on the internet. Blogging is a very odd little hobby for that reason alone.


M x Life Outside London

Sinead Dreaming said...

Exactly, it is a bit illogical how we feel OK with sharing things with strangers on the internet but not with some of our friends / acquaintances! x

Sinead Dreaming said...

Cool, it's great to know what everyone's situation regarding this is x

Sinead Dreaming said...

Yes, I'm pretty much the same as you. When I was with my boyfriend he mentioned it to his friend as if it was no big deal and I was like eeeek don't tell him!!!It is a bit strange. haha x

Sinead Dreaming said...

Yeah, I hate the idea of everyone who knows me being able to access my thoughts and feelings. It's fine for total strangers though! haha :) x

Sinead Dreaming said...

Thanks for commenting. It's so great to know that there are people out there who can empathise since lately everyone seems to be really open about their blogs. x

Sinead Dreaming said...

So glad there's people who feel the same way I do! it's really hard to explain why exactly I don't want people I know seeing it but I'm ok with strangers. I guess that's just how I'm comfortable! x

Sinead Dreaming said...

Wow, I'm in the exact same boat! I literally have 3 friends who know about my blog, and only one of them reads it regularly! Oh, and of course my mom! I never exactly knew WHY I wasn't telling people about, or I guess I couldn't verbalize it, but reading this post I found myself agreeing with everything you said! It's such a nice way to escape from my life and just write what I feel, without having to think about what family/friends will think when they read it. I also kind of like that's its my secret in a way? haha I don't know if that even makes any sense.

Anywho, I love this post! I'm glad I'm not the only one!

Sinead Dreaming said...

I had all of these same feelings. I told my fiance first and he read it and told me how great he thought it was. After some self coaching, I put the link on my Instagram and soon a ton of my friends were reading. I know it's hard, I still hide the photo taking part, but one step at a time I guess. (;
www.accordingtokiki123.blogspot.com

Sinead Dreaming said...

Trust me. You're not the only one. When I first got my blog I didn't tell anyone but the girl who asked me to get one. I still don't tell anyone. I mean, that friend didn't realise I wanted to keep it a secret so she told some people, but none of them know what it's called. I only have my best friend who regularly reads it, and I had to tell my parents because they were questioning my attachment to my laptop, not that they care enough to read it anyway. I think the whole escapism and objective view of randoms thing is really what a blog is about. It wouldn't be the same if I were writing for the people I talk to.

-M
The Life of Little
Me

Sinead Dreaming said...

I can completely relate to this! I was just thinking about this the other day, because the other bloggers I follow on instagram seem to have both of their blogging & "real life" combined...and it's something I'm just unable to do right now. I love blogging, and I'm proud of my blog- but I get a sense of freedom being able to blog absolutely anything that's on my mind without feeling judged by the people I know in "real life", haha. It's hard to explain, but thank you for sharing this post since it made me feel not so alone with this decision!

Sinead Dreaming said...

I know what you mean, sometimes it's nice to just be able to write, without having to consider whether anyone you know will read it and then question you on what you write! Pretty much everyone in my life knows about my blog now, it's been a year so they all eventually figured out what I was spending all my time on. They are all very supportive though which is nice! x

Jasmin Charlotte | UK Lifestyle Blog

Sinead Dreaming said...

Ya exactly! I'm almost two years and still no one knows haha. Glad everyone is supportive, I know mine would be too but I just prefer it this way :) x

Sinead Dreaming said...

So glad to hear you feel the same x

Sinead Dreaming said...

Yes, I would hold back a lot more if I knew everyone who knew me would read it! x

Sinead Dreaming said...

Love how your Fiance was so supportive. That was very brave, not sure I could do that yet, it would be a bit like giving everyone my diary haha! x

Sinead Dreaming said...

Yes, I found it really hard to verbalise my thoughts on it all aswell. Glad you could understand what I did say! haha x

Sinead Dreaming said...

I'm exactly the same, i don't feel the pressure to write as much as i would if i knew people i knew were looking at my posts and judging! Lovely post :-)

Jen,
Jennifer's Journal x

Sinead Dreaming said...

I started out my blog keeping it a secret but it eventually got out and people now know about it. It kind of bothered me at first that people I knew were reading it but now I just don't even think about it.

You shouldn't feel guilty at all. If your blog is your escapism from daily life and you enjoy it being like that then I don't see why you should have to change it.

Reinventing Neesha ❤️

Sinead Dreaming said...

Such a relief to know I'm not being odd feeling that way haha x

Sinead Dreaming said...

Thanks Neesha, I think you're right :) x

Sinead Dreaming said...

I haven't told many people about my blog & I prefer it that way. It would make me constantly think "what would 'x' think if I wrote this" every time I finished a sentence haha! But I might tell people in the future...maybe xx

Sinead Dreaming said...

I'm just the same! There's nobody I know in real life who reads my blog (or at least I hope not) and I prefer it that way. I also worry that I'm keeping some kind of secret but I figure that blogging's a kind of escape - sometimes it's nice to have something completely unrelated to the rest of your life to turn to.
I love the way you've explained this, I found myself agreeing with everything you said! Glad to hear I'm not the only one who feels like this x

Sinead Dreaming said...

Exactly! I'm a very quiet person in real life and don't share everything with everyone so I would be paranoid haha x

Sinead Dreaming said...

So glad you're in the same boat. It really is so reassuring as I was starting to think I was the only blogger who felt this way xxx

© Dreaming Again • Theme by Maira G.